The atomization of virtue
Also: "Malotype" - You're all the bits of me I hate
Odelia here with Percolations #81.
We want to do good, but (usually) only in ways that can be measured and quantified.
In this podcast episode with Johnathan Bi, Reid Hoffman explored the impact of AI agents on both society and individuals, on various levels.
Snuggled between the thoughtful questions and intriguing rabbit holes explored throughout the conversation, Hoffman mentioned how the development teams he works with were programming kindness, empathy, and understanding into the models they were building.
That comment troubled me even more than the pessimistic thoughts I mused over after digesting the growing technological progress explained by Hoffman. (I nearly put quotation marks around that “p” word, but it’d be uncalled for within this context.)
The idea that human goodness and goodwill can be atomized, packaged, and shipped into a “mind” to be expressed through a machine and accepted by people as the actual thing is bad enough — but what unsettled me even more was how much we already approach virtue with this mindset, AI-assisted or not.
For example, we think saying particular phrases at particular times demonstrates goodwill, even if they’re just well-trained reflexes.
(That’s why I’ve stopped saying “Nice to see you too” if I’m actually not glad to see them. I’d say something else — often, “It’s alright,” or “Glad you think so!” is enough. Not that I’m entirely consistent (and smooth) with this yet, but I refuse to lie and pretend even with the little things.)
For another, we think that we’re not thieves as long as we don’t take someone else’s physical possession without their permission. But is that really all stealing means?
What of being so inefficient or incompetent with what you do that you take away unnecessary minutes and even hours from the lives of others? Or when you give only the leftover moments and attention of your day-to-day to the people who’ve spent decades to raise you the best way they knew how?
There is a section in Khaled Hosseini’s The Kite Runner which made the entire novel unforgettable to me. Baba tells the protagonist:
“There is only one sin, only one. And that is theft. Every other sin is a variation of theft. When you kill a man, you steal a life... you steal his wife's right to a husband, rob his children of a father. When you tell a lie, you steal someone's right to the truth. When you cheat, you steal the right to fairness... there is no act more wretched than stealing.”
Once I’d absorbed these lines, I could never again see morality as a checklist.
Being truly virtuous, a “good human being,” is a way of life, a way of seeing the world and how everything connects to and relates to each other, and to breathe kindness and awareness into everything you touch — even if you train to take down another person with your bare hands, even if you recognize how easy it is to manipulate others, even as you’re facing your own demons and struggling to conquer them.
***
***
A sister of mine is currently working through the concept of whether there’s a God-given “calling” for one’s direction in life, or if one’s path is more about navigating the many choices before you while maintaining a clean conscience.
At one point in a recent discussion, she said: “I know there’s the moral will of God that’s clear in Scripture, but is that all?”
I thought, What did she mean by is that all?
Does she realize what it means to not steal, lie, or covet in each situation she finds herself in? Are the prioritizations, nuances, and shades of meaning in both theory and application of moral codes so simple and obvious that she’s done them all and find herself ready to move on from them? Has she already worked out what it means to love a neighbour as much as she loves herself; does she realize that she cannot be more kind to others than she is kind to herself, that even selflessness requires a measure of selfishness?
When you realize that there’s more to “being good” than just measuring yourself against words on paper, you begin to see that to live a single day without slipping up is impossible.
You notice how the simple lack of perception we have of each other causes so much unnecessary suffering. You understand how the little errors we make and fail to address break down trust and respect between friends — not because of human imperfection, but because of the lack of transparency and faith in the other friend’s forgiveness and grace.
Therefore, my response to my sister: “Fulfil both the letter and the spirit of the law, and then — only then — ask for that “secret will” of God, if it exists. I have a feeling that, as you pursue goodness and truth, you’d find that the path is narrower, clearer, and far more free and joyous than you expected it to be. Even if you never fully measure up.”
***
And yet we are told to “be perfect even as your Father is perfect.”1
How?
By understanding perfection not as perfection according to an external moral standard, but as the living out of one’s being fully and thoroughly.
It’s being entirely and only your self within all contexts and situations in which you find yourself, just as God is God everywhere all the time, without holding back and without apology. Yes, this “being yourself” looks different (and sometimes even paradoxical) when expressed in different contexts — even for the God in the Old Testament — but each expression is no less deep, honest, and clear as the other.
Here is where the humanity of virtue comes in, I think — and where algorithimized, atomatized “goodness” devolves into non-virtue. “The opposite of sin is not virtue,” Kierkergaard says — “the opposite of sin is faith.” “Whatsoever is not of faith is sin.” 2
To do good and be good requires a belief in the meaningfulness of it all.3 Belief that that there are differences between the types of people you can be, the types of lives you live, and the approaches you take to things — that even if there isn’t an absolute right-or-wrong for one’s life-path, there is a meh, a good, and a better.
It’s not about checking off a list and measuring up against a ruler, it’s a heart-stance and a mindset that becomes the foundation of your reflexes and defaults.
The difference between the moral checklist and actual human application of a “perfect life” is often, too, the trouble of seeing a thick black-and-white straight lined form we’re somehow supposed to fit into a chaos of colors and wavy lines, and still have our worlds turn out beautiful and coherent.
A moral code that is so theoretical and perfect it doesn’t connect to reality through the minds and actions of human beings (much less their souls and hearts) is less than useful — it drives despair into those who grasp the vision of the ideal but not the hope of ever beginning to climb the mountain.
The older I get, the more I realize how difficult it is to remain decent in the real world, live a sustainable life without dying inside inside, and still go the extra mile to spend the best of what you have — time, attention, care — on those who could give you nothing back.
That’s why kind, strong people who stand for things worth standing for — I like to call them “curators of light” — are so special and admirable.
But someone isn’t strong if they could benchpress 300lbs in a gym competition but couldn’t sprint and carry their child away from danger on a given day. You don’t measure kindness by the number of text messages sent, the length of phone calls given, the hours you’ve spent together with someone. You don’t count thoughtless parroting as genuine politeness but as misguided and perhaps unconscious untruths.
Does this line of thinking sound too strict, clean-cutting, uncalled-for?
Let’s take that thought about being perfect and weave in one more detail. (I didn’t mean to write a sermon, but maybe I just did, haha!)
Take this line:
“For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”4
I used to read this verse, nod, and move on. Yes, God approaches reality differently from how people do, obviously.
But what if we take up the challenge of looking at people as beings instead of façades? What if we approach ourselves and our decisions with a focus on the “integrity of being” instead of seeing everything as its own discrete part?
Not in the sense of going around poking people’s brains or spouting inappropriately personal questions at every turn, but in approaching interactions with others with the understanding that another heart and soul is at the other end of the conversation, a soul just as nuanced and complex as yours, and giving yourself and themself the time and space to go beyond what’s obvious and easy to accept.
***
So no, I don’t think you could code true kindness and virtue into existence. Developing them in people who already have an idea of goodness and evil is difficult enough, even within those who want goodness.
But yes, there is a blueprint for goodness, and it’s not written in ink or words we could read and pretend to understand.
It’s stained into the fabric of Life by the hand of Faith, woven between the mind and the soul; and its name is Love.
Odelia
Quote for the week
“This is about how you live, not who you are. A virtuous life shows up, serves others, tells the truth, and carries weight. Cynicism pretends to be clarity, but it’s just cowardice in disguise. If we can’t name good lives for fear of being wrong, we’re ceding the entire moral field.
We need a culture that asks people to shape themselves, not just express themselves. One that makes moral seriousness feel like aspiration, not judgment. That elevates the whole person, not just the optimized part. That forgives failure, but still expects us to try.”
— Matt Duffy, “We Know A Good Life When We See It”
This week’s word: “Malotype”
From The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows by John Koenig.
malotype
n. a certain person who embodies all the things you like the least about yourself—a seeming caricature of your worst tendencies—which leaves you feeling repulsed and fascinated in equal measure, having stumbled upon a role model of exactly the kind of person you never want to be.
(Latin malus, bad + typus, a kind of sculptor’s mold. A mold is essentially a negative image of the object you want to sculpt—so if you’re trying to shape yourself, perhaps a good first step is to scoop away the negative space. Pronounced “mal-uh-tahyp.”)
*** Stay far from me, leper and fiend While I stare from a safe distance Upon all I despise and detest; Yet you and I both know I despair Of never being able, honestly, To say of you, to you: "I know nothing of this person." ***
Snapshots of life
Another picture of Harley, taken by my younger brother Caleb (isn’t he great with the camera?!):
Give this a listen
Earlier this week I was thinking of tattoos (especially fine-line ones — so many beautiful designs out there!), and then this song drops:
Bullet notes from my desk
I like John Perry Barlow’s Principles of Adult Behaviours. Some of my favourites:
Expect no more of anyone than you yourself can deliver.
Remember that your life belongs to others as well. Do not endanger it frivolously. And never endanger the life of another.
Avoid the pursuit of happiness. Seek to define your mission and pursue that.
Never let your errors pass without admission.
Become less suspicious of joy.
Endure.
OMLOOP! — This transformed house is such a phenomenal architectural project. I’m in love with their mission statement:
“hé! is a young Brussels-based, bilingual architecture firm that prefers sustainable and honest architecture, using as many CO2 neutral materials and circular building systems as possible. We will renovate rather than build, compress rather than expand. We will optimize existing spaces and improve living quality so that no new construction is needed.”
Funny how much a significant toothache affects the texture and efficiency of my mind! More than 50 hours in, however, and it stops being funny. Amidst the hundreds of experiments I run on myself, it turns out a few absolutely stupid ones have slipped in. Oh well. I will be fine again soon, not to worry.
For those who want to hear me ramble about what my homeschooling experience was like, here’s the first podcast episode with Canada Homeschools. Enjoy! ;)
I didn’t get to create the special Percolations issue I had in mind for this week due to a hold-up on a website redesign that’s part of the idea, so maybe in two weeks! I’m excited for that one — and I hope I’m not hyping it up too much, lol.
Don’t you just hate it when you take a break on a creative project, then come back to it only to feel…nothing? That’s pretty much what happened with a song collab I’d been working on with a friend, and I couldn’t decide if it’s best for me to force something more, wait a little longer and try again, or just wrap up what we already have and call it a day. Maybe it’s because of how I’m drawn far more to acoustic instruments and the beat we’re using now is all electronic… In situations like this, it’s hard to say if there’s anyone to blame. Then again, maybe I should have stuck with my soul’s rhythms from the beginning. Ah — the things you learn when you try on different approaches for fit and vibe!
My readings the past week
From Matt Duffy’s Signal-Noise Ratio, a brilliant series on goodness, morality, and comfort in a tech-driven, efficiency-obsessed world. This series is one of the best things I’ve read online in a while. He writes with such clarity, purpose, and conviction — I’d like to communicate like this some day. If I believed in forcing people to do stuff, I’d tell you to put aside some time right now and read all three pieces slowly.
The Most Valuable Commodity in the World is Friction — An interesting outline on friction-driven shifts within the economy and people’s view on effort today’s world. This is the best section (to me):
“All three worlds are interlocked in this economy of friction:
In the digital world, effort is irrelevant. The chatbot does the thinking. The essay writes itself. You can vibe your way to a degree with a 20% sprinkle of “humanity,” and the credential still prints.
In the physical world, effort is everywhere. Air traffic controllers are running on trauma leave. The radar fails. The copper wire breaks. And the solution is not to invest, it’s to slow everything down.
In the curated world, effort is stylized and it’s optimized and it’s curated. The people who live there aren’t lazy or disconnected, they’ve just found a way to route around collapse. Life still works, but only in zones that are small enough to manage and expensive enough to protect.”
Everyone I know is worried about work — No job is coming to save us.
“When you accept that the future’s security may not come only in the form of a steady ascent up a pay scale, something shifts. You may not quit your job, but you reorient your time and professional priorities around independent people and relationships, not prestigious companies or brands. You may adjust your lifestyle, outgoings, consumption patterns, and sources of meaning so that they aren’t so reliable on a certain compensation package. You see the value of expanding your abilities and skills beyond merely looking employable online.”
Matthew 5:48
Romans 14:23
I think you could tell by now that I flirt regularly with nihilism. We’re just friends, though — ain’t no way I’m gonna willingly enter such a bleak marriage.
1 Samuel 16:6b
Nice cat