Long-suffering, or just plain stupid?
Also: "Occhiolism" - More than just a limited perspective (Part 2)
There’s a thin line between being forced to suffer and choosing to suffer.
And no, I’m not addressing this from the “change your perspective about it” perspective. I do stand with Viktor Frankl on how, when we can’t change a situation, we’re challenged to change ourselves from the inside.
But sometimes the answer’s more direct, practical, and embarrassingly simple than that; often, the solution to these problems are hidden more by our pride, fear, laziness, or plain stupidity than by other things.
I’m proposing that there are situations we often take for granted and think we must accept, bear, and suffer through in life, when that’s not actually the case.
Take health for example. Excess weight, hormonal imbalances, and acne aren’t things we “have to just live with”. At least for most of us, they can be removed from the equation of our existence altogether by changes to lifestyle and diet.
Or the tiredness some get after a night’s sleep. They think they solve the problem by ingesting caffeine in the morning (which, by the way, has to be timed properly for best results or else there’s no bang for your buck).
But they’re cheating themselves out of the actual solution—developing a more holistic evening routine, adjusting eating habits, staying away from screens (and getting a blue light filter1 installed), and moving enough throughout the day that your body’s happy and tired by the time evening rolls around.
And on top of not getting this part of life fixed, they’ve added another dependency from which to wean their body off in years to come. Not my kind of deal to make with reality; but hey, if you like to stumble your way into life each morning, what can I say…
What I’m saying is, a lot of little problems don’t have to be “crosses to bear” in life—it’s not even honorable in any way, if the suffering stems from something you shouldn’t have been doing in the first place, or from something you should have been doing but left undone.
Sometimes it’s not even a question of should and should-not. It’s as simple as whether you’re willing to understand the situation for what it is, and act differently given that understanding.
I hear you asking then, “Why do you choose to do things the more difficult way so often?”
This is where the mindset aspect of “suffering”, as well as the development and strengthening of one’s self comes into play. Suffering has its place, as do pain, hardships, and challenges.
I’m not advocating for always taking the easier path, or doing everything you can to make your life as comfy, predictable, and secure all the time. (More on this on Friday; see also my posts on A Warrior-Poet.) I stand quite strongly against living a complacent life surrounded by convenience, driven by a desire for constant comfort.
There just seems to be a strip of no-man’s-land where the question of “Does it have to be this way?” isn’t asked or addressed deeply enough, often out of wilful ignorance, lack of discipline, or irrational fear. That no-man’s-land contains hope for better learning, living, and humaning.
Changing your reality on that front would cost some self-awareness, common sense, and action, sure. But I think it’s a price you can’t afford not paying.
Odelia
Quote for the week
Something that impacted me in some way the past week, and think is worth sharing.
“Failing directionally is just success, iterated.”
~ Chris ~
This week’s word: “Occhiolism” (Part 2)
Since the start of 2024, I’ve begun a project of writing 7 poems, 3 songs, and 1 short story each week, using for my prompt an entry from The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows by John Koenig. I share the best from said project in this section.
occhiolism
n. the awareness of the smallness of your perspective, by which you couldn’t possibly draw any meaningful conclusions at all, about the world or the past or the complexities of culture, because although your life is an epic and unrepeatable anecdote, it still only has a sample size of one, and may end up being the control for a much wilder experiment happening in the next room.
***
Sand
I sense not all life boundaries;
I still challenge those who say,
"Watch your words and your actions:
Tomorrow springs from today."
Yet as the years come and go
I notice time's merciless hand;
Not much of yesterday lasts
Beyond bits of washed-out sand.
***
A place in my life
A glimpse into what a specific physical location I experience in real life looks, feels, and means to me.
“It’s not a big room, just large enough for a dining table, two benches, some chairs, and a couple shelves. A stone fireplace sits at an angle in one corner, its fire fed by pipes and gas, instead of wood from trees like the ones you see out the window right beside it. The walls are a dull brown, decorated with family pictures on the one side, and a Scripture passage written in Chinese brush calligraphy on the other. (The photos are pretty cool—people come and learn +1 addition when they examine the nine pictures one after the other, as well as get quizzed on their short-term memory trying to remember the names of each new kid or not-really-a-kid-anymore.) Music, arguments, stories, laughter, and tears are shared here, sometimes. But there’s always food shared. Always food. Definitely food. Good food.”
Give this a listen
I don’t watch a lot of anime, but Your Name brought tears to my eyes. This cover of “Sparkle” is absolutely lovely.
Bullet notes from my desk
I noticed something about the Chinese character for “understand”. 明 . In Psalm 19: 2-3, we’re told that “Day unto day uttereth speech, and night unto night sheweth knowledge. There is no speech nor language, where their voice is not heard.” Now, 日 is “day”, and 月 is “moon” in Chinese, signifying the night. The word for understanding, then, is a combination of the day and the night—exactly what the Psalmist expresses. Cool, huh?
I came across some oddlinks yesterday, oddly, with an odd post about the odds of something being far more odd than we often think. (Yes, I have an oscilliating obscession with “O” words. Of course, Odelia.) Anyways, just might be worth your time checking out, if you have an odd minute…
I use and recommend Iris; using this link gets you a 10% discount, and I get a little something for telling you about. ;) Of course, you can always pay the full price here instead.